When I restarted writing on here, I had this fantasy of daily posts on here.
In hindsight that was a lovely idea not based in this ever evolving reality.
The last few days have been hard. On top of J's job shift, one of my sibs got sick. He is better now, but I was worried.
My anxiety has been primed over the last week. I've started seeing (virtually) a therapist again. Only one session in and I'm already aware of how helpful this will be.
We've come up with a pretty good daily schedule. Dare I say a groove was found?
Then this morning, G was having a really hard time.
He was just really sad. We didn't let him skip out on his class's zoom, a toy got wrecked after going through the wash, we couldn't go to a beloved toy store while doing a required errand and we set up a FaceTime met up for later that he wasn't feeling today.
He needed time and space to be really sad, and cry it out.
I held him, and for the first few minutes, was feeling myself get amped about all the lost time from my allotted work time and all the stuff I needed to get done.
Then I stopped the brain spin, and took a deep breath and truly became present for my son. I even cried a little too.
We sat.
We breathed.
It was a necessary stop and regroup for both of us.
I still need to get that stuff done.
'That stuff' will always be there.
When he was feeling better, he let me know.
I let him know I was feeling better too.
No grooved schedule today.
Just survival with all the needed tears and hugs.
No comments:
Post a Comment